


The Curious Incident of the Angora in the Cargo Bay

by Vermin_Disciple



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: Crack, Gen, Illustrations, Rabbits, literal fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-13
Updated: 2020-09-13
Packaged: 2021-03-06 15:54:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 558
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26451445
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vermin_Disciple/pseuds/Vermin_Disciple
Summary: “What is it doing in the cargo bay?” Odo persisted.“It appears to be gnawing on that crate of self-sealing stem bolts. Perhaps you should find it a more suitable chew toy.”“According to the shipping manifest, this rabbit belongs toyou, Garak.”
Relationships: Elim Garak & Odo
Comments: 13
Kudos: 34





	The Curious Incident of the Angora in the Cargo Bay

**Author's Note:**

> This is the inevitable result of taking a frankly embarrassing number of photos of [Squishy Garak](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25752247) posing next to my pets ([e.g.](https://vermin-disciple.tumblr.com/post/625832977869471744/accidentally-unleashing-a-herd-of-giant-mutant)), and then screwing around with GIMP and Pixlr to amuse myself. [Also posted on Tumblr](https://vermin-disciple.tumblr.com/post/629178401870184448/the-curious-incident-of-the-giant-angora-in-the).

* * *

“Garak.” Odo crossed his arms and scowled. “Why is there a giant rabbit in the cargo bay?”

“It isn’t merely a rabbit. _That_ is a Lapinian angora,” said Garak, with as much haughty indignation as he could manage under the circumstances. “Not some common Effrafan giant or Thlaylian lop.”

“What is it doing in the cargo bay?” Odo persisted.

“It appears to be gnawing on that crate of self-sealing stem bolts. Perhaps you should find it a more suitable chew toy.” The rabbit came up to his chest, about the height of a yearling riding hound. Its incisors were going to make quick work of that crate.

“According to the shipping manifest, this rabbit belongs to _you_ , Garak.”

Lapinian was a notoriously difficult language for universal translators to cope with. His order of handspun Lapinian angora _yarn_ must have been misconstrued. Well, this would certainly delay the construction of the Andorian ambassador’s sweater.

Clearly the sensible thing to do would be to admit the error and request assistance in sorting out a return and exchange of the merchandise.

“Ah, yes. I’ve been under a great deal of stress recently,” said Garak. In fact, he’d been so bored lately that he welcomed the next errant space anomaly eager to wreak havoc on the station. “And Dr. Bashir recommended that cohabiting with a fluffy non-sentient quadruped can be very therapeutic for most humanoids. The tactile experience of stroking their fur apparently has a soothing effect on the nervous system and triggers the release of endorphins.”

“So you bought yourself a pet. Because Dr. Bashir recommended it.”

“Is that so hard to believe?”

“You never take Dr. Bashir’s medical advice except under extreme duress.”

As a rule, he resisted Dr. Bashir’s medical intervention even and especially under extreme duress.

Suddenly, the rabbit sat up and flicked its ears, as if something had startled it. Without further warning it thumped its sizable back feet on the floor—sending a tremor throughout the cargo bay that nearly knocked Garak off balance—and dived behind the nearest shelf. A few of the small canisters stored there rolled off and clattered to the floor.

“I don’t care why you got it or what you plan to do with it,” said Odo, “just take it to a more suitable location immediately. And I don’t want you or it causing any further disturbances of the peace in future.”

“My dear Constable, I promise that you won’t hear of any trouble from either of us.”

Odo harrumphed.

Garak approached the rabbit cautiously. Lapinian angoras were known for their docile temperament, but any large animal could prove dangerous, especially when agitated. He risked slowly reaching out his hand towards it. The rabbit seemed to appreciate the attention, because it crept forward and nudged his hand with its nose, and then flattened down into a blissful lump on the floor when he stroked its head.

Mila had often told him that his mouth would get him into trouble (and followed up with an “I told you so” whenever it did). Perhaps after shearing the wool he could foist the creature off on the O’Briens. Small human children liked anything soft and friendly, did they not?

Then again, maybe he should give the matter more consideration before relinquishing a renewable source of high-end fiber. Especially one that seemed partial to Cardassians.

**Author's Note:**

> No animals were harmed in the making of this fic, though one French/German angora was slightly annoyed during the photo shoot (until she was rewarded with some dried fruit as compensation).


End file.
